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Patrick F. McManus ListingsIf you cannot find what you want on this page, then please use our search feature to search all our listings. Click on Title to view full description
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Alan Liere, foreword by Patrick F. McManus Fish Tales: A Collection Of Humorous Fishing Stories
STACKPOLE BOOKS 0977945413 / 9780977945412 Paperback BOOK
A collection of 80 of the funniest fish adventures, misadventures, & reflections by popular humor writer Liere. 5 B&W illus; 5x7.5 inches, 176 pgs.
'Fish Tales is a collection of adventures, misadventures, and reflections by popular humor writer Alan Liere. All who spend time on the water can relate to Liere's outdoor outtakes. This collection gathers 80' of the funniest 'Fish Tales' featured in Northwest, Southwest, and Eastern Fly Fishing magazines and is the perfect gift for anglers of all ages.
WHAT THE EXPERTS ARE SAYING:
'Not many writers can write short and well. Even fewer can write short and well and move the reader. Al Liere does all three.' -- Paul Quinnett, PhD, clinical psychologist and the author of Pavlov's Trout
'This is writing at its best.' -- Scott Stouder, Western field director for Trout Unlimited
'His work is proof that the funniest things in life are generally the truest.' --Chris Madson, editor, Wyoming Wildlife
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Alan Liere, a lifelong resident of Eastern Washington, is an award-winning humor columnist for Wildfowl, Northwest Fly Fishing, Southwest Fly Fishing, Eastern Fly Fishing, Petersen's Hunting, and The Upland Almanac magazines. He is a member of the Northwest Outdoor Writers Association, Outdoor Writers Association of America, Safari Club International, Ducks Unlimited, and National Rifle Association.
Price:
15.60 USD
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Patrick F. McManus Grasshopper Trap
VHPS (HOLT & ST MARTINS) 0805001115 / 9780805001112 Paperback BOOK
Patrick at his best, another side splitting collection of stories that will keep you laughing from cover to cover. 5x7 inches, 207 pgs.
Price:
11.70 USD
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Patrick F. McManus How I Got This Way
VHPS (HOLT & ST MARTINS) 080503482X / 9780805034820 Paperback BOOK
His latest release. You'll be laughing your way through this introspective journey into McManus's wild world of outdoor adventure. 5x7 inches, 200 pgs.
Price:
13.00 USD
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Patrick F. McManus Into The Twilight, Endlessly Grousing
SIMON & SCHUSTER 068484799X / 9780684847993 Paperback BOOK
From the uncertain joys of standing waist-deep in icy water, to the eternal verities of chicken-fried steak and strong coffee drunk by the campfire, Patrick McManus continues to delight with more wonderful tales from trout country in this, his 13th hilarious collection. 6x9 inches, 224 pgs.
'Like Twain -- or more contemporary humorists Dave Barry and Garrison Keillor -- Patrick McManus shares the belief that life's eternal verities exist primarily to be overturned. In McManus's world, all steaks should be chicken-fried, strong coffee is drunk by the light of a campfire, and fishing trips consist of men acting like boys and boys behaving like the small animals we've always assumed they were.
In this, the tenth hilarious collection of his adventures, wry observations, and curmudgeonly calls for bigger and bigger fish stories, McManus takes on everything from an Idaho crime wave to his friend Dolph's atomic-powered huckleberry picker to the uncertain joys of standing waist-deep in icy water, watching the fish go by.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
The Boy
Mountain Men
Smoke!
Sam Spud and the Case of the Maltese Fly
Other Than That, Bostich...
The Chicken-Fried Club
Into the Twilight, Endlessly Grousing
Dream Fish
Will
Crime Wave
Attack of the Stamp People
Big Ben
Roast Beef
The Fly Rod
The Stupidity Alarm
Work and Other Horrors
The Dangers of Light Tackle
Faint Heart
Mrs. Peabody II
Cereal Crime
Pickers
My Fishing Trip with Ernie
For Crying Out Loud!
Fan Mail
Bike Ride
Uncle Flynn's Hairy Adventure
Hunting the Wily Avid
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Patrick F. McManus has spent the last three decades being funny. In 1982, after a fifteen-year stint amusing the readers of Field and Stream, he moved to Outdoor Life, while still finding the time to write twelve books and two plays. He divides his time between Spokane, Washington, and the wilds of Idaho.
REVIEWS
"Everybody should read Patrick McManus." --The New York Times
"Describing Patrick McManus as an outdoor humorist is like saying Mark Twain wrote books about small boys." --The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
"Patrick McManus is a treasure." --The Atlantic
"A style that brings to mind Mark Twain, Art Buchwald, and Garrison Keillor." --People
"McManus is today's most gifted outdoor humorist." --Detroit Free Press
EXCERPT: (Chapter 1) The Boy
Sometimes I'd take the boy fishing. He was not my boy but somebody else's, and that was good, his appetite and the cost of food being what they were. Mostly, I used him to hold down the bow of my canoe, instead of the bags of lead shot I usually employed for that purpose. He was smarter than the lead shot but not so much you would notice.
"I wonder what causes the tides, " he said once.
"The moon, " I told him.
"The moon!" he cried, doubling over with laughter. "You expect me to believe that' You must think I'm stupid!"
I treated myself to a thoughtful pause.
"The earth is round, " I said.
"So'" he said. "Everybody knows that."
"Just checking, " I said.
The boy was about sixteen that year, the year I used him for lead shot. Whenever he ran out of money, which was often, he would come over to my cabin on the river and work for me. Mostly, I would have him dig holes in the ground. When you own a cabin on a river, you always have need for lots of holes in the ground. I enjoyed listening to him complain about the pay, because then I knew I wasn't paying him too much. I prefer to err on the side of not enough, because it is wrong to spoil youngsters by paying them too much.
Whenever he complained about the pay, I would tell him about my first job. I was fourteen and worked for a farmer all one summer digging holes in the ground. The farmer was so cruel and sadistic that he had probably once been a commandant in charge of a slave labor camp. But I was the only one who suspected his previous employment. Everyone else thought he was a fair and decent and good-hearted man. But they didn't dig holes for him.
"Vork! Vork!" the farmer would scream at me.
About once a week I would get mad and resign my position. Then the farmer would come and tell my mother what a fine worker I was and that he wanted me back to dig more holes. He told her that my work habits had improved greatly under his supervision, and now my pace was such that he could often detect movement with the naked eye. So Mom would make me go back to digging holes.
"Vork! Vork!" the farmer would scream.
By the end of summer, I hadn't earned quite enough money to buy my first deer rifle. The farmer gave me a bonus to make up the difference! I was astounded. Furthermore, I became the only person he would let hunt deer on his property, because I had been such a good and loyal worker and also because there were no deer there.
"So, " I said to the boy, "do you see the moral to this story'"
"No, " he said. "It's a boring story and I don't want to hear it ever again."
"Vork! Vork!" I shouted at him.
Sometimes, when the fishing was good, I would go out in the canoe almost every morning. I would get up very early and rush down to the river still buttoning my shirt, but the boy would be there already, waiting. I suspected he slept in the canoe, just so I couldn't slip away without him. We would paddle off to fish the channels that flowed between the islands where the river merged with the lake. As we paddled along we would exchange our theories about the purpose of human life. My theory was that the purpose of life was to perfect ourselves through learning and discipline in order to fulfill our cosmic responsibilities as part of the self-consciousness of the universe. He thought the purpose of human life was for him to buy a car.
At the beginning of summer, the boy knew nothing about fishing, but by July he knew everything and had begun to advise me.
"That fly you're tying on is too big, " he'd say. "Better go to a sixteen. And switch to a black gnat."
"How do you know all this'" I said.
"It's easy, " he said. "I think like a fish."
"I can't argue with that, " I said.
He enjoyed teasing me, because now he almost always caught more fish than I did. I would chuckle good-naturedly, swack the water just so with the paddle, and soak him to the skin.
The boy had a talent for getting on my nerves. I could remember how peaceful it had once been, when I was a solitary paddler, slipping quietly along the channels between the islands, doing everything just right, becoming one with nature and the mosquitoes and deerflies. But now the boy was always there, yakking, advising me on fishing technique, philosophizing about cars, complaining about the lunch I'd brought along and the pay he was getting for digging holes.
And then one morning he wasn't waiting for me at the canoe. He didn't come the next morning either. Or the following week. It was a relief. I was glad to be rid of him. Having nothing else to do, I asked around about him the next time I was in town. Most folks had no idea who he was, but the lady who runs the grocery said she thought he lived out on such-and-such road. Still having nothing else to do, I drove out the road and found an ancient mobile home approaching terminal depreciation, under some scraggly pines. No one was home. A man stood watching me over a nearby fence.
"They's gone, " he said. "Just packed up and left one day. Headed for Oklahoma. I'm from Oklahoma myself."
"Oklahoma, " I said. "Any fishing there'"
"Good fishin'."
"I'm glad to hear it."
I went out fishing the next morning but it wasn't the same. A boy works a whole lot better than bags of lead shot for holding down the bow of a canoe, no question about it.
About a week later, another boy showed up at my cabin, apparently having heard I was short a boy. He was a redheaded kid with glasses that kept slipping down his freckled nose.
"I hear you got some work here, " he said.
"I do, " I said.
"What's the pay'"
I told him. He managed to stifle any hint of elation.
"What's the work'"
"I got all these holes I need filled up."
"I guess I can do that." He watched me for a moment, pushing his glasses back up his freckled nose. "What you doin' there to your canoe'"
"Nothing much, " I said. "Just removing some bags of lead shot from the bow."
Copyright ' 1997 by Patrick F. McManus
Price:
11.70 USD
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Patrick F. McManus Kerplunk!
SIMON & SCHUSTER 0743280504 / 9780743280501 Paperback BOOK
In these tall tales, McManus & his buddies learn how not to net a fish, why you should never get your hair cut by someone who's mad at you, what to do when a deer wanders into camp but your sleeping bag has frozen shut, & how to avoid bird-dog flatulence. 5.5x8.5 inches, 240 pgs.
'Patrick F. McManus's gently comic stories about outdoor life have earned him millions of fans worldwide. With Kerplunk!, McManus delivers a collection of folksy, wonderfully wise depictions of country life worthy of Mark Twain.
In these tall tales, McManus and his buddies learn how not to net a fish, why you should never get your hair cut by someone who's mad at you, what to do when a deer wanders into camp but your sleeping bag has frozen shut, and how to avoid bird-dog flatulence.
Traveling the highways and byways of the Pacific Northwest, the delightful backcountry characters of Kerplunk! understand how a life of hunting and fishing -- and its inherent potential for misadventure -- can resonate with larger meaning. McManus's characters know exactly why it costs $500 to make a fly lure that retails for $2; why installing a boat trailer hookup can lead to divorce; and, most important, why you should always listen for the sound of your fishing line hitting the water -- because in life as it is in fishing, you don't know you're in the water until you hear the kerplunk!
These wry, curmudgeonly tales appeal to real outdoorsmen and the armchair variety alike. Often nostalgic, occasionally philosophical, and always funny, the stories in Kerplunk! reaffirm Patrick F. McManus's reputation as an American classic.
Price:
13.00 USD
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Patrick F. McManus The Bear In The Attic
VHPS (HOLT & ST MARTINS) 0805072950 / 9780805072952 Paperback BOOK
Ponders the strange allure of the RV, the existential implications of being lost, the baffling tendency of animals to outsmart those who wish to hunt them, & the singular pleasure of doubling the size of every fish one doesn't actually catch. McManus' most riotous collection of essays to date. 5.5x8 inches, 240 pgs.
'Overflowing with his trademark outdoorsman's wit, Patrick F. McManus's newest collection ponders the strange allure of the RV, the existential implications of being lost, the baffling tendency of animals to outsmart those who wish to hunt them, and the singular pleasure of doubling the size of every fish one doesn't actually catch.
Combining the curmudgeonly voice of Dave Barry and the sly humor of Garrison Keillor, McManus brilliantly captures the everyday absurdities that comprise our existence. Alongside his humor, McManus's inimitable vision consistently evokes a childlike wonder at the natural world. Even if we are running low on food, the compass is broken, and we are fairly certain we have just spotted a family of Sasquatches frolicking in the treetops, the Bear in the Attic makes the outdoors seem irresistible.
WHAT THEY'RE SAYING:
"Patrick McManus is a treasure." --The Atlantic Monthly
"Everybody should read Patrick McManus." --The New York Times Book Review
"A style that brings to mind Mark Twain, Art Buchwald, and Garrison Keillor." --People
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Patrick F. McManus has written 12 books and two plays. There are nearly 2 million copies of his book in print, including his bestselling They Shoot Canoes, Don't They', The Night the Bear Ate Goombaw; and A Fine and Pleasant Misery. He divides his time between Spokane, Washington and Idaho.
Price:
11.70 USD
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